When scattering ashes for a family member, one typically thinks of a designated individual who takes the remains to the location selected, says a few words, maybe reads a poem and scatters the remains as those in the family look on. Perhaps there is music or a toast and maybe the family historian notes the time and location of the scattering - I am not confident that this last item happens with any regularity, but am hopeful. Sounds pretty traditional for the non-traditional interment, doesn't it?
Figuring out how to honor someone to match their own uniqueness can sometimes be a challenge. Remembering that loved ones is as individual as each person. The places, events and memories shared by some may be completely lost for others. Case in point:
My dad spent 16 years married to my mother, having a typical Midwestern suburban life and participating in very traditional events. Then after he and my mother divorced, he remarried and became a father 3 more times, he traveled more extensively and visited two other continents. The people, places and things that were important to him had increased exponentially. How are my younger siblings to know the father from my childhood and vice versa how am I to know the father they had when I had my own young family?
Dad's solution is priceless! He has outlined his memorial service to include stories - the funnier the better, photos, food and multiple toasts all to be concluded with each person taking a small portion of his ashes home with them. Scattering to be done in a manner that captures the individual they knew and loved. For some, perhaps they will scatter at a familiar haunt or annual event, for others maybe they will take him with them on future trips; to places he always wanted to see. Wherever Dad goes, he will live on for each person in a uniquely personal way, thanks to those funeral favors!